Paleo Cinnamon Banana Raisin Walnut Bread

Jesus, that’s a mighty long name for a food. Let’s just call it PCBRWB. Much easier.

Ingredients:

WET:

• 3 Egg
• 3 Bananas *Go for ripe, approx. 300g total. 
• 2TSP Raw Honey

• 1½ Scoops of Vanilla Whey Protein Powder *Controversial paleo? Only for those that aren’t 100% I guess. Sub in 1TSP vanilla extract, or more if you so desire. 
• ½C Raisins
• ½C Almond Flour
• ¼C Coconut Flour
• ¼C Walnuts *Crushed.
• 1-2TBSP Cinnamon
• 1TSP Nutmeg
• ½TSP Baking Soda
• ¼TSP Sea Salt

Directions:

• Preheat your oven to 350F. Take all of your dry ingredients, mix into a bowl, and set aside:
• Now, with your handy handy blender/processor, place the bananas, eggs, and honey into whatever you have and blend:

• Next step? Pour the mixed concoction of raw deliciousness into the dry mix, AND MIX IT UP ‘MON:

Mmm, THAT ACTION SHOT THOUGH.

• Next up, grease your bread loaf pan, whatever the hell it’s called, up with your choice of poison. I use PAM Olive Oil spray:

It really didn’t stick guys! :P

• And pour your batter into the pan thingy:

Looks good, right? NOT YET.

• ..Then lick the spatula.
• Alright, see that ½C of crushed walnuts you haven’t used yet? TIME TO MAKE THE CALL TO THE BULLPEN: 

I won’t lie to you if I was short a few walnuts while spreading it on the bread..

• Place in the oven, bake for 35-40 minutes (Depending on your oven; mine is convection), and kill some time while waiting for this delicious bastard to finish baking. They should be done after 35, but stick a toothpick in it and make sure it comes out clean, just to be safe.
• Ready for some #bananabreadporn?

Alright, maybe I exaggerated a little.. But you get the point.

And that’s all there is to it guys! I honestly can’t tell you how long these last, because since I’ve made this, the loaf disappears within 2 days. And it’s not just me. For my family to like it enough to eat it says a LOT on how good this is.

Maybe I’m just hyping everyone up. Fuck, sorry if it takes like total shit and you’ll unfollow me and hate me forever.

By the way, I haven’t tried making this WITHOUT whey protein powder.. If you take it out, I’d assume just add ¼C of almond flour or something..

If you’re the group that likes it, high five. You can toast these bad boys in the oven/toaster and put some of that grass-fed butter. DELICIOUS!!!!!

Speaking of, I’m going to make some right now.

I really hope you guys enjoy!

©robJAR

PALEO Coconut Milk Chocolate Ice Cream 

I’ve been looking all over the internet for an ice cream that didn’t use dairy, soy, and honey/syrup. I looked for a good hour and just said “Fuck it, I’ll experiment.” I think I did it guys. I think I got it all down.

Yes. 

Ingredients:

• 14oz. Organic Full-Fat Coconut Milk *1 can. 
• 3TBSP Hershey’s Unsweetened Cocoa Powder
• 4.5TSP Stevia
• 1TSP Vanilla Extract
• ¼TSP Sea Salt
• 1 scoop of Vanilla Whey Protein Powder

Directions:

• Blend all that ‘ish together. If possible, try and put your coconut milk (still in the can) in the fridge for a few hours before you do it. It saves the process of you having to let it cool for a few hours, which means less waiting time to eat!

• Get out your handy dandy ice cream maker (Thank you again. :D), and churn according to the manufacturing’s instructions. I let it churn for ~15 minutes.

Make sure the actual compartment where you’re putting your mixture in is rock solid. You shouldn’t be hearing any slushing going around if you were to shake it. 

• You’re all done! Take out the mixer, pour the ice cream into an airtight plastic/glass container, and stick it in the freezer. OR, you can just eat it right away. :D

Soft. Creamy. I’m talking about ice cream.

• Now, for the not lazy: If you have an ice cream maker, or will get one soon after reading this post, you’ll know that the sides and bottom stick, wasting all that extra ice cream you can have. Solution? If you’re patient, carefully CAREFULLY use a knife and push down along the sides and score the bottom until you break it iff into little pieces. I swear I probably ate about half. Oh my God it was good.
• 
• 

*Serving Size: Makes approx. 3 cups

Macros for the entire thing:

Perfect for a FAT day. You can actually eat the entire damn thing, given you ease up on fats for the rest of the day.. Unless you don’t give a fuck. ;)

Yes, it’s dairy AND soy free. Sure, there’s some stevia but if you’re super duper hardcore paleo, sub it for some honey or leave it out all together.

Before you eat, take it out of the freezer and let it sit at room temperature for about 10 minutes. Makes the consistency amazing.

Next time I’m going to add some more protein and figure a way to lessen the fat content.

Hope you guys enjoy this one!

©robJAR

Paleo Sun-Dried Tomato Basil Pesto

Ingredients:

• 1 Fresh Pack of Basil
• 7-8 Sun-Dried Tomatoes
• 1C Walnuts
• ½C minus 1TBSP Olive Oil
• 4-6 Garlic Cloves *Sub. in 1-2TBSP Ground Garlic if you want. 
• 1TBSP Lemon Juice

Directions:

• Remove the basil from the stems, wash, and drain.

• Process your walnuts until it’s in really tiny pieces, then add the sun-dried tomatoes, garlic, and lemon juice and process further.

*Serving Size: I start with 1TBSP, and if I need more to whatever I add.

This SHOULD last for at least a week, but I’m sure if you’re a pesto lover, it might go sooner.

Sorry for the lack of pictures. This was made somewhat on the fly, as someone from Instagram had requested a recipe!

I actually made another pesto recipe way back, but this one is totally better. I’m deleting the old one soon. Lol

©robJAR

Paleo Cookie Cereal

Ingredients for the cookie:

WET:

• 1 Egg
• 1½C Blueberries
• ½ Scoop of Whey Protein Powder *Preferably vanilla!

• 2TBSP Enjoy Life Chocolate Chips
• 2TBSP Almond Flour/Meal
• 2TBSP Coconut Flour
• 1TBSP Unsweetened Cocoa Powder
• 1TSP Baking Powder
• ¼TSP Sea Salt

Directions:

• Preheat your oven to 350F!
• Now, start off by mixing together your wet ingredients. Not too fast there speed racer, you want to mash/process 1C of blueberries. It’ll help not make the cookie dry when you’re mixing everything together, and avoids having to use other ingredients like more eggs or types of milk.

Thanks again mom for getting me this awesome little thing from the Philippines! :)

• Once you’re done, pour the mashed berries, whole berries, and one egg into a mixing bowl, and mix together.

Action shot. Mix it all up!

• Throw in your dry ingredients on top, and mix well.

Before and after. It’s hard not to eat it at this state.. Just think of the raw egg if you’re afraid of that. :P

• Take out a cookie sheet (Or in my case, a baking pan because I’m a boss), cover the top with parchment paper, and spread it out as evenly as possible.

Throw this sucker in the oven for 20-25 minutes, pending how soft/firm you want it. 

• Now while that’s in the oven, make the milk! Simply put all the ingredients in a blender, blend, and place in a fridge until your cookie’s good to go.

• Once you’re satisfied by the cookie’s texture, take it out and place it on a cooling rack for a few minutes. *Trust me, you wouldn’t want to place hot berries in your mouth. When that shit bursts, it’s like a volcano erupting in your mouth hot. Not fun. 

Boom. 

*Serving Size: Eat as much as you want. Hell, finish the damn thing.

Ever since I had the SoDelicious ice creams, I’ve been hooked. I think I’m going to do a review on each flavor eventually :) I even did this earlier today:

You mad? You should be, because it was divine.

I hope you guys enjoy this as much as I do. I mean you guys see me have this almost everyday lol.

If I have time, I’ll try and post up macros if anyone asks for it. Would you guys be interested?

©robJAR

Riced Cauliflower

Ingredients:

• 1+ Cauliflower Head

Size comparison with my cracked screen Droid X. :|

Directions:

• Unless it’s dirty, I usually avoid cleaning it because it’s better if you grind it down dry (It won’t be all mushy when you’re done with it). Half the cauliflower and remove the core and leaves. BE CAREFUL. I sliced part of my palm yesterday doing it because I was being stupid. :(
• Once you get it into little pieces, further remove the stems so all you’re left is the actual cauliflower.

Don’t throw the stems away! You can use it for stir fry recipes. :D

• Throw the cauliflower into a food processor and grind it down to a consistency you desire.

Macro mode, activate.

• Store it in a fridge. I’m assuming it should last a good week or so before it goes bad.

Two cauliflower heads. Made me about ~12 cups.

• When you want to use it, pour 1-2TBSP of water per cup of cauliflower and nuke it for two minutes. Remember, you never cooked it, and if you don’t do this you’ll be eating it raw and hard. This ‘steams’ it in a quick and easy way.

*Serving Size: 1 head made ~5 cups for me.

Making this will probably turn into a weekly routine for me. I’ve never really missed eating rice/brown rice (I know, being asian you’re all probably going wtf?), but this is one of the many ways I have fun eating vegetables. :)

Enjoy!

©robJAR

Awesomely Awesome Scrambled Eggs

Ingredients:

• AN UNLIMITED AMOUNT OF EGGS!
• Cooking spray/Coconut Oil/VOO/EVOO

Directions:

• Put a pan on the stove at a medium-high heat.
• Crack those eggs and whisk to your heart’s content. I usually mix it until it gets a little bubbly.
• Once the pan seems warm, add your oil/spray. Now if you’re using oil, you don’t want a pool of it just bathing. You want enough to cover the pan with a light coat, so pour a little and roll it around until it covers most of your pan. If you need more, add more.
• DROP THOSE SUCKERS ON THE PAN, and lower the heat ever so slighty. :P
• Once you start seeing the edges harden up a bit, push the edges towards the center and repeat every now and then. It’s kinda like you don’t want your eggs to just stay on the pan. I let the eggs sit for a few seconds, then stir it around, and repeat.
• Turn the heat to medium. Eventually, the eggs will harden up. I just keep mixing and turn parts of the eggs that are uncooked over until I reach the consistency I desire. Turn the heat off when you’re happy with how it looks, serve it on a plate, and dig in!

*Serving Size: However many eggs you use. :)

Inspired by @powerrprincess after her fustration of not being able to cook ‘em properly. :P I like to think they come out pretty good. Try it out and let me know what you think?

If you want to see more pictures, just go around my Tumblr. :P

I’ll re-write this again with step-by-step pictures. I know the wording might be a little complicated to understand so sorry ahead of time lol.

©robJAR

Fruity Spinach Smoothie v1.0

Ingredients:

• 2C Spinach
• 1C Unsweetened Coconut Milk
• ½C Unsweetened Almond Milk
• 1 Frozen Banana
• ½C Blueberries
• ¼ Hass Avocado
• 1TBSP Unsweetened Cocoa Powder
• 1 scoop protein powder of your choice *I of course use vanilla. :)
• ¼TSP Pure Vanilla Extract

All of it. Blend it.

Stacked to the brim.

Directions:

• Add and blend/process all the ingredients until fairly smooth.
• Bottoms up!

*Serving Size: Makes you full. :P

Self-approval. :D

Surprisingly not as bad as I thought it would. Seriously, thinking about the fact that there was spinach in here was.. Meh. Everything else kinda ‘overpowered’ the spinach (Thank God.) so it was delicious :)

It kept me full and gave me energy for a good few hours, which was good because I needed it after a crazy morning at the box followed by an 11-hour shift. 

I hope you guys found it as good as I did! :D

©robJAR

Paleo Ketchup

Ingredients:

• 2 6oz. Cans of Tomato Paste
• 1½C Water
• 2TBSP Vinegar
• 1TSP Garlic Powder
• 1TSP Onion Powder
• ½TSP Allspice
• ¼TSP Ground Cloves

Directions:

• Place all of the listed ingredients into a pot/pan and keep it to a low/medium heat, stirring occasionally. Do this for about 10 minutes.
• 
• Let it cool, transfer it to a fancy container:
• 
• ..and then fridge it!

*Serving Size: Enough to last for a while, unless you drink this. ..Nasty.

I have no idea how long this will stay good in the fridge since there’s no preservatives and whatnot, but I’ll guess a few weeks? Be warned, it’s not as sweet as regular ketchup, since there’s no sweeteners of any kind.

©robJAR

Avocado Banana Smoothie

Ingredients:

• 1C Unsweetened Coconut Milk
• ½ Frozen Banana
• ¼ Hass Avocado
• 1TBSP Unsweetened Cocoa Powder

• 1 scoop protein powder of your choice *I of course use vanilla. :)

Directions:

• Add and blend/process all the ingredients until it’s to the texture of your liking.
• Drink/Spoon into mouth. Or stare at it.

*Serving Size: Makes 1¼C.

The ending result gave me a thick, creamy texture mostly due to the frozen banana and avocado. I had to spoon the smoothie out of the cup instead of drinking it. I’m sure if you add more milk, it’ll thin out.

I loved eating it the way it was though. It’s my go-to breakfast when I wake up and I’m running late, or a snack/meal replacement. I definitely didn’t need to add any sweeteners or anything similar; it was sweet enough for me. :)

©robJAR

Paleo Broccoli and Chicken Pesto Wrap

Ingredients:

• 1 Cauliflower Bread Wrap
• 2-3TBSP Paleo Pesto Sauce *Or more if you like. :)
• 4oz. chicken *Raw measurement.
• Handful of Broccoli *Steamed.

• Cayenne Pepper. *Some like it hot. :P

Directions:

• Assuming you made my cauliflower bread and pesto sauce:
• Cook the chicken. Duh. Steam the broccoli and cut into smaller pieces.
• Plate the bread wrap and spread some pesto sauce on it.
• Placed your cooked, diced chicken on the bottom ¼ of the wrap. Then, place the steamed broccoli on the bottom ½ of the wrap, overlapping the chicken.
• WRAP IT UP, ‘mon.

*Serving Size: Makes 1 wrap.

The way I did it is that I wrapped it up not as a roll, but more of a taco and then covered it in foil.

You can totally pre-make these and if you have a toaster oven (or something similar), just place it to the ‘Keep Warm’ setting for a few minutes!

©robJAR